Where is Krsna? Where is Krsna?
Srila Gurudeva: The Gopis are at the bank of the Yamuna. They are crying heavily and weeping and singing pitifully. You should have a connection with kirtan in the same way that the Gopis are weeping.[Upon Srila Gurudeva’s indication, the devotees sing the mahamantra in a sweet melody.]
“Oh Krsna, where have You gone leaving me here? Stealing our hearts, where have You hidden them? Oh You are so charming, You are speaking so lovely and You were smiling so much, and by this You took our hearts. Now You have heard our pleas, ‘Come on,’ otherwise we will die at once.”
[Devotees sing the mahamantra.]
Singing in this way one sakhi was crying bitterly and rolling down, then another sakhi came and asked, “Why you are worried? Krsna is so merciful He will sure come, so we should try to continue our kirtan.”
[Devotees sing the mahamantra]
Another sakhi said, “Oh, why you are weeping? Krsna is here and here and here and here,” and so she stood and looked, “Where is Krsna? Where is Krsna?” but then Krsna disappeared again, so the Sakhis thought, “We should pray again.”
[Devotees sing the mahamantra]
I think that in New Braja there are three sisters and five sons, the daughters of Nirguna prabhu and their mother. You should all sit together and sing like this, and always chant and remember like this. You can also sometimes make a drama like this—one sakhi has fainted and another is telling, “Oh sakhi, here hidden behind this kadamba tree is Krsna, and He is weeping, “Oh where, where, where?” and again singing:
[Devotees sing the mahamantra]
Rupa Gosvami and Sanatan Gosvami are doing bhajana like this, this is bhajana. Always lamenting, always weeping, always shouting loudly:
he radhe vraja-devike ca lalite he nanda-suno kutah
sri-govardhana-kalpa-padapa-tale kalindi-vane kutah
ghosantav iti sarvato vraja-pure khedair maha-vihvalau
vande rupa-sanatanau raghu-yugau sri-jiva-gopalakau
Be like that, but not imitating them. Reduce all your worldly desires. Make yourself one-pointed like this, “Oh where you are? Krsna! Krsna!” The Gopis are singing Hare Krsna. Why? “Oh you take all the offenses, you take all the anarthas, you take all the sufferings and sorrows and everything, birth and death, and we are here looking for You, searching here and there, but you have become so hard and cruel.
We know that we are not cruel, so come at once, otherwise we are going to die, and then when You return and see that we are all dead, what will you do? What you will do?”
So they are singing like this: he radhe vraja-devike, this is real kirtan, so you should do all kirtan like this. Also remember all of the pastimes of Krsna and Caitanya Mahaprabhu. Especially Nityananda Prabhu and Caitanya Mahaprabhu, it will give you more strength, and your life will be successful. But then there will be the problem: how we can maintain our life?
Has Krsna told anything about this? He has told in the Gita that those who are devotees, who are always chanting and remembering, giving up everything, forgetting everything, then I take them on my shoulders and on my head and I give them their every requirement.
What is this sloka?
ananyas cintayanto mam
ye janah paryupasate
tesam nityabhiyuktanam
yoga-ksemam vahamy aham
What is this? Once there was a very learned and very intelligent person. He was not doing anything for his maintenance, and his wife was also there with him. Somehow she used to provide his food, prasadam, and everything he needed, anyhow, and he was writing a commentary on the Gita. His name was Arjuna.
One day he came to this sloka:
ananyas cintayanto mam
ye janah paryupasate
tesam nityabhiyuktanam
yoga-ksemam vahamy aham
Krsna will Surely Maintain Us
Those who are always absorbed in chanting and remembering, forgetting everything else, then I must go there with their requirements, taking on my head or my shoulders. He saw that for a long time I have been very poor, we cannot even collect enough clothes and maha prasadam, but He has never come to us to give anything.
It may be that He can send through anyone, but why would He Himself carry these things? And I have experienced that for a long time, for sixty years, Krsna has never come to bring anything. I have so many requirements of food, lodging, and everything, but He never came.
So he took a red pencil and crossed out that sloka, and then he went to beg something for maintaining their lives. For that whole day up to three or four in the afternoon he could not collect anything, on other days he would get something, but today nothing. He returned and he was so worried about this, “What will I tell to my brahmini, my wife? Today I have nothing to give, today we will have to fast.”
But in the meantime, somebody knocked on the door of that brahmini while she was alone there. She was so poor that she was not well dressed. She had only one torn cloth, so she was not going to open the door, but whoever was there knocked three or four times, and so she at last opened the door and she saw a very, very beautiful boy of about twelve, who was the color of the sky, very soft, speaking so sweetly, like an ordinary boy, not extraordinary.
His cloth was yellow, and He was so much worried, and sweat like pearls were coming from His body, and she saw that there were some baskets full of corn, wheat, rice, ghee, and other things, and the boy was breathing heavily.
The brahmini asked, “Who are you boy?”
“I am the disciple of Arjuna Baba, he is My guru. Is this the house of Arjuna, My Gurudeva? He gave Me so much weight, and he ordered Me to go and to give to his wife, but I was delayed for one or two minutes. He called Me, but there was some delay, it was My fault, and that is why he became angry and with his nails he scratched Me here,” and then this boy showed the scratches on His body to the brahmini, blood was coming from them.
He told her, “Mother, take these things into your kitchen,” and he helped her to take everything inside her kitchen. There were so many things that the kitchen became full of these things.
The brahmini told that boy, “My dear son, You are coming from a long distance and You are breathing heavily, so You should take some rest, and I am bringing water for You,” but she saw that there was nothing in her home to give to Him, so she requested that boy, “You should wait here and in two or three minutes I will prepare something for You,” and so she went into the kitchen and began to prepare something, and she thought that that boy was still waiting there.
After some time her husband returned and began to knock at the door. She was so upset and a little angry toward her brahman husband thinking, “Why did he give so much weight on the shoulders of this soft and small little boy, and apart from that when he was only two or three minutes late, why did he scratch him? He was never so cruel before, but now he has become so cruel.”
And so, angrily she went and opened the door and she began to rebuke her husband, “Why have you done these things? Why have you become so cruel? Why did you scratch the back of that boy? And who is that boy anyway?”
“I don’t know, I have not met any boy.”
“Oh? Your disciple!”
“I have no disciple.”
“Come on with me, I will show you, he has brought two big baskets full of everything that we need.”
“Where did you get all these things? I want to meet this boy.”
“He is sitting here, come with me,” and they went to where she thought the boy was sitting, and they searched for that boy, but that boy was not there.
They searched here and there, but they could not find him. But that brahmana saw that there were baskets full of so many things, enough for two, three, or four months, just as he had asked for.
Then the brahmana told his wife, “Bring my Gita book, I want to see it and to write something.”
She brought the book and opened to the page where he had crossed out the sloka, and he saw that there was no red mark there, and he began to weep loudly, “Oh Krsna! Oh Krsna! You are true, all of Your words in the Gita, every letter is true, but I could not accept and have never realized that You are so kind.”
So what was I telling? On what subject was I giving this example? Krsna will surely maintain us if we are like that, so don’t give so much worry for that. If you are not doing anything, but are absorbed in chanting and remembering, like me; I have no business, I have no way of making money, but Krsna sends everything.
Sometimes I weep, “How He maintains me? Why He maintains me? I am not observing like it says in the Gita, but even so, why do so many people weep for me? Why do they weep? I don’t know.”
I think that when anyone brings something to me, they may think to themselves, “I am so fortunate that Maharaja is taking my thing,” but then they become hundreds and thousands of people bringing me something, and I never have to buy anything from the market, never, never. I see that there are so many clothes, so many things, everything I could need. If I am sick somewhere, then doctors come for free to see me, and if we try to give something they reply, “No no! I will not take anything from you!”
And I don’t see why all these things are coming. So I have experience. I have no money at all, not a single paise or shilling or penny, but Krsna is arranging that I am going throughout the whole world, and wherever I go, hundreds and thousands of friends become mine. Anyone may have one daughter, but I have hundreds and thousands of very beautiful, very little, and energetic daughters. Someone may have one child, somebody may not even have one, but I have so many.
My children, my sons, and daughters may be one hundred years of age, anyone may be eighty years, another may be two years, anyone is a lakh, and there are so many serving me in so many ways. Some are giving garlands. Why, if I am not observing Krsna bhakti? I don’t know why Krsna is so merciful, He gives more than I have qualities. So have some faith in Krsna, then you will see that you are happy forever. Anyone in this world can give us up, but Krsna will never give us up.
You may ask, “But He is not coming and giving darsana,” but this is also His mercy, He wants to increase our love and affection for Him and our desire to serve Him. So anyhow you should develop your belief in Krsna, a very strong belief. In this world we see that all are engaged in their self interest, even if they are doing bhajana some selfishness is there, but Krsna is not selfish, Mahaprabhu is not selfish, He has come to give His everything to the world. So we should be like that and you will see that there is no problem at all, quickly it will go. Don’t be worried for the maintenance of your life, “How Krsna will come to me? How will I serve Him?” This is the mood that you should always be absorbed in, and then you will see that there are no problems, money will come.
Devotees Do Not Have To Do Anything
I went to Govardhana once, empty handed, I had nothing. At that time I determined that I should be in the lap of Govardhan, and I will never ask for anything, like Madhavendra Puri. I thought, “I will test Krsna, how He and Govardhan are merciful,” and when I reached there empty-handed, our panda of Govardhan came to me and asked, “Oh Maharaja, why you are here empty handed? Oh come with me and stay in my house, I have a separate room for you outside of the village, it is alone and very good for you to do your bhajana.”
And I wondered, “Why this person came?” And when I reached that room, I saw that chapati with ghee with so many good vegetables and sweets, butter, and sweet rice and everything was there waiting for me. I thought, “I did not want anything, but Giriraj is giving.”
So I believe in Govardhan, I believe in Krsna, I believe in my Gurudeva. My belief is so strong: the whole world can be stopped, Laksmi can beg anywhere, but devotees do not have to do anything like this. Like when Srivas Pandit clapped his hands three times— Mahaprabhu asked him, “Why are you clapping, one, two, three?”
Mahaprabhu had asked him, “I am not seeing any mouse or rat in your house.” Why? Because he had nothing to eat, where mice and rats live there is sufficient to eat, but He did not see any rat or anything, he was so poor! He had nothing to eat for that night, so Mahaprabhu was asking, “How you will maintain?”
“Oh, I will maintain,” Srivas replied.
“How?”
“One, two, three,” Srivas said, while clapping his hands with each number.
“What is the meaning of this?” Mahaprabhu asked.
“I will fast one day, I will fast the next day too, and after that one more day, three, and if nothing comes after that, then the Ganges is just here, I will jump into it.”
Then Mahaprabhu embraced him and said, “I know that Laksmi can anyhow beg anywhere, but you will never have to beg. Krsna will surely arrange for you.”
So don’t worry for all these problems. Only one thing is the solution to all our problems. What is that? Hare Krsna. [Devotees sing the mahamantra]
The Process of Controlling the Mind
Then another Gopi asked, “Where is Krsna? Where is Krsna? Why isn’t he coming?”
Another Gopi said, “Oh I know a better mantra than this!” Govinda Damodara Madhaveti! Directly sing His names: Govinda Damodara Madhaveti. This is directly the name, not Hari. Directly His name: Govinda Damodara Madhaveti, Govinda Damodara Madhaveti, Govinda Damodara Madhaveti, Govinda Damodara Madhaveti, Govinda Damodara Madhaveti, Govinda Damodara Madhaveti, Govinda Damodara Madhaveti!
You can add, “Hey,” no harm, but quickly, like so: Hey Govinda Damodara Madhaveti, Hey Govinda Damodara Madhaveti, Hey Govinda Damodara Madhaveti, Hey Govinda Damodara Madhaveti, but still Krsna is not coming, so then another Gopi says, “That Krsna is so cruel, so we can leave Him, give Him up, Srimati Radhika is so merciful, why shouldn’t we call Srimati Radhika?”
Then they began to call Radhika.
[Srila Gurudeva and the devotees sing:]
Radhe Radhe Radhe jaya jaya jaya Sri Radhe
Radhe Radhe Radhe jaya jaya jaya Sri Radhe
Radhe Radhe Radhe jaya jaya jaya Sri Radhe
Radhe Radhe Radhe jaya jaya jaya Sri Radhe
Radhe Radhe Radhe jaya jaya jaya Sri Radhe
Radhe Radhe Radhe jaya jaya jaya Sri Radhe.
But She will not come alone, She will not come, She will come with Krsna only, so sing both names. How?
Srila Gurudeva sings:
Radha Ramana Hari Govinda Jaya Jaya
Radha Ramana Hari Govinda Jaya Jaya
Govinda Jaya Jaya Gopala Jaya Jaya
Govinda Jaya Jaya Gopala Jaya Jaya
Radha Ramana Hari Govinda Jaya Jaya
Chanting all these things, this is the symptom, and what else? Remembering the pastimes of Krsna, like the Gopis, like mother Yasoda, like other devotees, like Rupa Gosvami, and Sanatana Gosvami, this is the process of controlling the mind. The mind will automatically be controlled, thinking like so and doing bhajana. When you read any book, be quite absorbed, and see that, “Oh I am vividly seeing all these things, the pastimes of Krsna,” then it will perfect.
When remembering, remember like this, when chanting, chant like this, when doing kirtan, do kirtan like this.
[Devotees perform kirtan] Chanting Harinam like this, and doing like this:
Hare Krsna Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare
Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare
makheśvari kriyeśvari svadheśvari sureśvari
triveda-bhāratīśvari pramāṇa-śāsaneśvari
rameśvari kameśvari pramoda kānaneśvari
ṣvrajeśvari vrajādhipe śrī rādhike namo ’stu te
Like this, chanting something, new, new things, and remembering all these things, this is the process of doing bhajana. Vaisnavas come, Guru comes to give these processes how we can control our minds.
[Devotees and Gurudeva do kirtan together]
Hare Krsna Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare
Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare
Hare Krsna Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare
Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare
Jaya Radhe Jaya Radhe
Jaya Radhe, Jaya Radhe,
Jaya Krsna, Jaya Krsna
Jaya Krsna, Jaya Krsna,
Gaura Premanande.
So through this process you can do bhajana, and absorb your mind in this. Through this your worldly requirements will also be fulfilled, everything that you like.
If you are chanting:
Hare Krsna Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare
Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare
and in your mind you are thinking, “Money, money, money, money,” then money will come, surely it will come. If you are thinking that:
Hare Krsna Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare
Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare
“I want a very beautiful new wife, Hare Krsna Hare,” don’t do it, otherwise Krsna will give this and He will fly away, at once He will fly away. He can give all these things very quickly, very quickly, but He will have to think for longer whether My Krsna prema should be given to that person or not, but He will give these things very quickly.
You can see that so many persons, even living in temples, being pujaris and these things, they are worshipping Krsna, chanting, remembering, but they are thinking about how to fulfill their desires, and at once Krsna gives all these things and they become householders, even sannyasis, so don’t want these things. What we have, be satisfied with that. In whatever asrama you are, if householder, if sannyasi, brahmacari, be like that, and try to develop your Krsna consciousness and remember the sloka:
tan-nama-rupa-caritadi-sukirtananu
smrtyoh kramena rasana-manasi niyojya
tisthan vraje tad-anuragi-jananugami
kalam nayed akhilam ity upadesa-saram
Only this, I have nothing to tell after this. Bhaktivinoda Thakura has written at the end of his Jaiva dharma, what I have wanted to give to this world I have given, after this my writing is stopped, my giving is stopped, my everything is stopped, there is nothing to give after that. So you should do like this.
I Have Kept My Heart With You
I am so fortunate to be among you here in Badger, New Braja, and here meeting with so many devotees. I was so encouraged that if anyone needs anything, Krsna gives him all these things.
Svamiji wanted to preach in the Western countries and he came alone with only his karatala, and nothing else, no money, not a farthing, not a penny, not a dollar, nothing, and he performed miracles, sitting in Thompkins Square Park, surrounded by hippies, and began to chant, “Sri Krsna Caitanya Prabhu Nityananda, Sri Advaita Gadadhara Srivasadi Gaura bhakta vrnda,” and Krsna made all kinds of arrangements, and he preached over the whole world. How? He is also bringing me. At the time of Svamiji I had promised that I will come and join him, and this little desire has now made me come here.
I think to myself, “Why did I leave Vrindavan?” Why am I not in any grove of Vrindavan weeping bitterly, “Oh Radhe, where are You?” but instead I am roaming here and there, only because of that desire. So I think I will not have any desire now.
You can now ask any questions, also time is finished, it is half past seven. Today is Ekadasi but I have not chanted, I was engaged in attending to you all, I think that tomorrow some of our devotees will return to their homes, I will go to Houston. I have kept my heart with you and I have kept your hearts with me, so I will remember you wherever I go, and you must also remember me, but I think that I have given so much, so many things, if you keep it in your heart you will feel like Rupa Sanatana. You may be in your houses and but I will know that you are weeping for Krsna, and I will be so much pleased, so go on doing all these things. If I have told anything harsh and opposite to your hearts, don’t mind it, forget that. But I will always remind you of these things.
I cannot repay you, especially the little children, the girls and boys, so innocent, they are coming to me, so I am now worried, “How can I help them?” I am worried. So I will pray to Krsna that He should make some arrangement that these orphan sons and daughters should be supported and nourished.
You who are senior Vaisnavas, you should try to help them, otherwise new plants without water can dry up, I want that every plant that I have planted should be watered, and this responsibility goes to you. You should try to help them that these plants should not dry up. If I hear that they have dried up, then I shall weep.
When Krsna heard that all the plants are going to dry up, the cows are dying, and most of Vrajavasis are dying, Krsna at once came. So you should look after the new devotees and help. Anyone should not be hopeless, never. In the realm of Krsna, no one should ever be hopeless, always have hope.
Utsahan niscayad dhairyad tat tat karma pravartanat—like this go on. You should try to read the Nectar of Instruction, it will help you so much. Anything more? Any questions?
[Devotee asks question]: If Krsna gives everything that we need, will he also give the association that we need?
Srila Gurudeva: Yes, certainly. If we will pray like this, from the heart, he will at once manage. I think that I have come only by the management of Krsna. Some devotees here were weeping to Krsna and so Krsna said, “Oh you should come,” that is why I came.
Today we finish here. I will request you all that you should never be hopeless, you should not give up quality chanting and remembering. If you have any question or anything, then you can write to me in Vrindavan or Navadwip or Mathura, I will very quickly reply, and if you have no money problem then you can come to Vrindavan in Kartika, and if you have money problem then think that, “I am in Vraja, Vrindavan, chanting and remembering.” Don’t worry.
[Kirtan]
So remember all of my teachings, you can return to your homes, and if possible you can come to Vrndavan for Kartik, and after that if you will make me again come here then I will come, so you should pray to Krsna that I should be healthy so that I can return again.
Gaura Premanandi!
[Srila Gurudeva speaks to the mother and daughter who were leading the kirtana] I think that in Badger you and your mother should be in the role of sakhis, and always trying to call all others from time to time and do kirtan and hari-katha like this. And Nanda Gopal Prabhu is also qualified, all are qualified, they can give classes on Caitanya Caritamrta, on Srimad Bhagavatam and thus go on chanting and remembering.